turnonmyheels | PSA - to all folks writing Vampire Diaries Fanfic

When Damon and Elena went off to Atlanta, Elena asked him why he bothered to eat since he only needed blood to live

Damon replied, "As long as I eat a healthy diet my body functions normally."

Last night, Katherine told Stefan that even if he had no blood and was completely desiccated his "heart would still beat". and the veins would rub together

Do you understand what this means? After reading fic for the past season and I half I think you do not. Therefore I will explain [with bullet points!]

In The Vampire Diaries television canon

* Vampires breathe
* Vampires have body heat
* Vampires have beating hearts
* Vampires piss
* Vampires shit

in other words NORMAL BODY FUNCTIONS.

From

kadymae There was also that scene a few episodes ago where Caroline explained she ate food because it was satisfying and it helped take the edge off her craving for blood.

Please note: STEFAN DOES NOT HAVE A HEALTHY DIET

That is why he drinks coffee. And I quote "coffee helps the blood move around and raises the body temperature"

ONE MORE THING

Elena did not "drink the tea" after she lost her necklace BECAUSE STEFAN WAS FEEDING FROM HER

Check your fandom! This is not Buffy. This is not True Blood, Dark Shadows, Moonlight, Anita Blake or any other of a million other vampire mythologies.

/rant

people who are desperate for fic in their fandom should never be this cunt-y, I understand this, but sometimes I cannot help myself

ETA JFC - it is STEFAN not STEPHAN. ::head desk::