(no subject)

[turnonmyheels]

ETA Happy birthday thisisbone I wish for you all the shirtless Taylor Kitsch your eyes can handle with some bonus Channing on the side ;-) Is it time for Magic Mike yet?

Dear Avengers Fandom,

For the love of all you that hold holy aka Thor:

I know Tony's last name

Pepper is not a shrieking harridan

Pepper is not a harridan

Pepper is not an obstacle to be over-come in the course of making Tony gay

People can have fluid sexuality. Even people who are extremely hetero on the Kinsey scale can sometimes to be attracted to a person, not a gender

Learn what a POV is and stick with it

Wondering and wandering mean completely different things. For that matter so do then and than. And their, they're, there.

If you write one sentence in present tense, generally speaking you should write *all* your sentences in present tense. There are some exceptions, find someone who knows more about grammar than you or I to explain them. The same works for past tense. Pick one and stick with it!

Get a beta! No really, get a beta. Or at least use the spell check function on your computer, I know you have one all computers come with them. USE IT.

If you say in your summery [see what I did there?] that you don't even know what your fic is about or that it's about ALL THE FEELS or you'll only write more if you get comments you're turning off an entire audience of ancient fandom hags like myself [and really my decade plus doesn't mark me as ancient there are people who have been doing this for 35 years +]

Please for the love of Thor, Odin, Loki, and Frigga have a fucking feeling instead of a feel. Or at least quit tagging about your feels. Your tags that you think are clever? Are actually annoying as shit. Having more than 10 tags on a story just so you'll have the most tags? Not the way to get readers.

Comments

[ladycat777.livejournal.com]

I love you. I am also glad as hell that I haven't come across fic where Pepper is anything less than a BAMF that everyone bows down to, because she is and they should.

... I kind of use feels? I know! I've been corrupted with those young whippersnapper kids! It's horrible.

And yet I have ALL THE FEELS :(

[sassangel.livejournal.com]

Oh dear lord. I don't know what half of what my kid says any more, I have no desire to sort through it in my entertainment.

Also, that comment for more chapters thing? I hated that ten years ago when I started and I want to rip the little fuckers heads off now and show a thesaurus down their neck when I see it now... ahem.

Seriously? It's been over a decade? Ah. The way we were... I think I feels something. Damn. I can't use this newfangled lingo.

[nochick-fics.livejournal.com]

ALL THE FEELS

The hell does that even mean?

[azewewish.livejournal.com]

Also, we get it, Thor is a god, STOP BANGING ME OVER THE FUCKING HEAD WITH THIS FACT. Just call him Thor. It's not that freaking difficult.

Also, Clint has a name, please stop calling him "the archer", especially during sex scenes. (See also: "captain" for Steve, "scientist" for Bruce, "spy" for Natasha, "billionaire" for Tony.)


And yeah, call me an old fandom hag, but all the feels just fills me with all the friggin' rage. Use your words, people. (See, also: "because...reasons." The only time the whole "because..." thing works is when Cleolinda uses it in her 15 Minute Movie Review for Prometheus & explains some random crazy point with "because...science", because that's EXACTLY what Damon Lindeloff did in the script. Just handwaved the science.)

[ldthomps.livejournal.com]

Oh noes! I had a sad when I read your post. :(

Ahahaha, ok, maybe not. I know a lot of people label such posts "unpopular fannish opinions"? But from everything I've heard from my corner of fandom, your opinions are RIGHT and should feel good about themselves. Because bad grammar and misogyny and self-indulgent bad-writing are all NOT OK.

Ahem. Anyway! Did you intend the "fluent" instead of "fluid" sexuality, or have their rampant homynyms corrupted you? Not that I don't think Tony's sexuality is Totally Fluent as well as Fluid.

You: RIGHT IN THE FACE. (whatever that means)

[moosesal.livejournal.com]

Oh honey. May your blood run soon. *g*

And this is why I don't read much that hasn't been recced to me anymore.

[mskatej.livejournal.com]

ahahaha ilu

I'll see your 'all the feels' and raise you 'life ruiner'. Like, both of these things were probably brilliant the first time they were uttered, but they've since been destroyed by witless ubiquity. Just because it was funny/clever once, doesn't mean it's automatically funny/clever every single time.

[thisisbone.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Thank you! And it is ALMOST time for Magic Mike! ALMOST!